The Boundary Problem - Part Three
Many people fail to understand that there is a very significant set of differences between saying that a given understanding is rule-governed and indicating that an understanding is principle-governed. Rule-governed behavior tends to be linear in the sense that a given form of reasoning is applied to different circumstances in, more or less, the same manner on each occasion. For example, in spelling, there are certain rules in English - such as 'i before e, except after c' - which are used as an aid to children who are learning how to spell. Or, there are rules like: 30 days has September, April, June, and November; all the rest have 31 with the exception of February.
Rules can be complex (as with games), but, the expression of the logic of a rule is usually reducible to some sort of formula, of sorts, which is to be applied at the appropriate time -- and, thus, the existence of rule books which can be consulted and for which a rule, hopefully, can be found to cover each and every contingency. When circumstances become too unwieldy, one starts to note various exceptions to the rule, such as in the days-of-the month example used above.
Principle-governed behavior, on the other hand, tends to be non-linear - that is, one cannot easily, if at all, reduce things down to some formula which can be applied across a wide variety of circumstances in, more or less, the same fashion. For example, there is no rule for love ... there is no formula, simple or complex, one can take and try to apply it to all situations and claim that this is what love entails. Furthermore, if one tried to reduce love down to a set of rules plus exceptions, one would end up with so many exceptions, that one would begin to lose any feeling for what love was all about.
Love is a principle, or a set of intertwining principles, which is grasped by those who have some understanding of love or who have a taste for the quality of experiences through which love was expressed. If one has the requisite insight, one can recognize the presence of love, or one knows how to respond in a loving way, but there is no way to predict the form which love may assume in any given set of circumstances.
Many people within the Muslim community wish to treat the boundary problem as an issue of rule-governed behavior in which the same formulas are applied to everyone in precisely the same way. Others, and among them are the people of tasawwuf, have tried to suggest that life is inherently non-linear and, therefore, a rule-governed approach to the problems of life may, ultimately, breakdown and generate difficulties for individuals, families, communities, and nations.
Hazrat Abu Hurairah, who was a close Companion of the Prophet (peace be upon him) and who was responsible, by the Grace of Allah, for generating the first collection of sayings, traditions, or Hadiths of the Prophet (peace be on him) once said to a Muslim: "There have been two sets of traditions which have been transmitted by the Prophet (peace be upon him). One of these you know, but if I were to disclose the other set to you, people would slit my throat."
There are several issues of importance that are being alluded to here. Not only does one wonder what this second set of traditions may be about, but given that this second set of traditions or Hadiths are from the Prophet (peace be upon him), one wonders why some people would slit the throat of Hazrat Abu Hurairah if they were to learn the nature of such Hadiths. Perhaps, one of the reasons involved here is that the hidden set of hadiths may have been rooted in the kind of principles which would have been very difficult for rule-governed mentalities to be able to understand and accept -- and rule-governed behavior tends to color much of what happens with exoteric interpretations of the principles inherent in both the Qur'an and the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him).
The Prophet is reported to have said: "Do not give wisdom to other than the people of wisdom for you will be doing the wisdom an injustice, and do not prevent the people of wisdom from obtaining it and, thereby, do them an injustice." Moreover, people who are spoken to through a medium which is not consonant or resonant with their modality of understanding, tend to be very resistant to, and, quite frequently, extremely hostile toward, whatever part of the truth they do not understand or about which they are in denial.
The very nature of Islam has always been to reform, and, thereby, help people work toward improving character. The Prophet (peace be upon him) has said: "The best thing in the Scale on the Day of Judgment will be a beautiful character."
Issues involving prayers, fasting, consumption of alcohol, gambling, slavery, treatment of women, and so on were not introduced all at once, but over a period of time. The institutions through which abusive forms of behavior were practiced in relation to such issues were gradually reformed over a period of 23 years - the length of Muhammad's (peace be upon him) Prophetic mission.
If one looks to the conduct of the Prophet, one encounters: kindness, compassion, empathy, forbearance, love, sincerity, honesty, nobility, courage, charitableness, forgiveness, patience, humility, modesty, fairness, justice, integrity, adab, practicality, commitment, flexibility, discretion, even-temperament, trustworthiness, steadfastness, balance, considerateness, sacrifice, loyalty, and gentleness. If a person sought, for the sake of God, to conform to the foregoing qualities, but was somewhat lax about, say, observing some of the five pillars, what would happen?
We don't know. And, one of the reasons we don't know is that Allah may forgive whomever Divinity pleases -- "O my slaves who have transgressed against their own souls! Do not despair of the Mercy of Allah Who forgives all sins." (39:53) In fact, Hazrat al-Ghazali indicates in his Revival of the Religious Sciences that the quality of God's Mercy is such that even if humankind were suddenly to stop committing sin, that Allah would create another species of being who would sin so that God could forgive them. Indeed, as is said in a Hadith Qudsi: "My Mercy takes precedence over My wrath."
Consider the following Hadith which gives expression to the unpredictable character of principle-governed behavior. There was a man who came to the Prophet (peace be upon him) and indicated that he (the man) had failed to keep the fast of Ramazan - that he had intentionally eaten when he should have been fasting, and the man wanted to know what he could do in order to make amends for the sin which had been committed.
The Prophet (Peace be upon him) indicated that, in accordance with the instructions of the Qur'an, one could make expiation for such a mistake by fasting for two consecutive months. The man replied that if he couldn't keep the fast for even one month, just how was he supposed to keep the fast for two months? The Prophet (peace be upon him) responded by indicating that in lieu of fasting for two consecutive months, Allah had indicated that one could feed the poor. The man said that he, himself, was poor and had no means to feed the needy.
The Prophet (peace be upon him), then, had a Companion bring some food from the store house of supplies for the community and gave the food to the man and told him to distribute the food among the poor of the valley. The man said that in all of the valley, there was no one poorer than he and his family, to which the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Then, take the food and give it to your family, and that will serve as your means of giving expiation for your sin of not fasting during Ramadan."
Allah's forgiveness is like this. We do not know how, or in what way, it will be dispensed.
It is said that on the Day of Judgment there will be some who will never have done an iota of good in their lives, and, yet they will be forgiven everything. Why, because Allah wishes to show to all of us that Mercy depends on the character of Divinity and is not dependent, in any way, upon our behavior -- that is, what we do or what we do not do.
Although we do not know what will happen to someone who transgresses against Allah, we do know the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Kindness is a mark of faith, and whoever does not have kindness, does not have faith." Moreover, the Prophet (peace be upon him) has said: "What actions are most excellent? To gladden the heart of a human being; to feed the hungry; to help the afflicted; to lighten the sorrow of the sorrowful, and to remove the wrongs of the injured." And, in addition, the Prophet (peace be upon him) is reported to have said: "Shall I not inform you about a better act than fasting, zakat and prayer? -- making peace between one another. Enmity and malice tear up heavenly rewards by the roots." And, again: "If you love your Creator, then love your fellow beings first," as well as, "Deal gently with people and be not harsh; cheer them and do not condemn them." The Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him said: "Assist any person who is oppressed -- whether Muslim or non-Muslim."
Finally, the Prophet (peace be upon him) is reported to have said: "If you people (the Companions) were to leave out even one-tenth of that which has been made incumbent on you, you would not inherit Paradise, but there will come a time when if the people of that time do even one-tenth of what has been made incumbent on them, they will inherit Paradise."
The foregoing does not mean human beings may, or should, take license with God's inclination to Mercy and forgiveness. As the Prophet (peace be upon him) indicates: "The right and the left are both ways of error, and the straight path is the middle way." Moreover, the Prophet (peace be upon him) is reported to have said: "If the believer's fear and hope were to be weighed, they would balance." So, although the errors of the right and left might encompass a variety of things, one possibility is that one should try to avoid being carried away either by excessive hope of Divine leniency or excessive fear of Divine chastisement, and that a balance of fear and hope in these respects may be nearer to a middle path of balance.
Given what has been said in all that has been expressed up to this point, one might ask about what is the status of ijmah ( consensus of the ulama, or learned ones) with respect to how one should proceed in life. While one might be able to say, with considerable justification, that some of the basics seem to have been, and remain, settled, nonetheless, there are vast areas where there is no consensus about how best to proceed - in fact, in this day and age, there is no consensus on even who should be included among the ulama -- whether past or present -- who are to be polled to determine if any consensus exists on any given issue.
We are left with the choices which were given by Mu'adh ibn Jabal, previously mentioned, who, when asked by the Prophet (peace be upon him) what criteria would be used in making decisions, cited the Qur'an, the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him), and ijtihad, or striving to develop his own judgment in relation to a given issue that was not dealt with clearly by either the Qur'an or the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him) -- at least as understood by Mu'adh ibn Jabal.
Yet, even here, the heart of the one deciding such issues must be receptive to, and ready to merge horizons with, what the Qur'an or the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him) have to teach one if one is to have the requisite ears with which to hear, and the right sort of eyes through which to see. The Qur'an states: "Allah has not assigned unto anyone two hearts within their body," (33:4) and the one heart we have is caught in a struggle between, on the one hand, the pull of nafs, dunya, Iblis and unbelievers, and, on the other hand, the call of ruh or spirit.
With respect to the issue of marriage, there are some who will point to the Quranic ayat which says: "and their husbands have a better right to take them back in the meanwhile if they wish for reconciliation; and they have rights similar to those against them in a just manner, and the men are a degree above them, and Allah is Mighty, Wise," (2:228) and these same individuals may also refer to the Hadith of the Prophet (peace be upon him) in which he is reported to have said: "If a wife could prostrate to anyone besides Allah, it would be to her husband."
Many men, under the influence of nafs, dunya, and Iblis, suppose that when Allah says "men are a degree above" their wives that this constitutes an expression of unqualified, unconditional, absolute eternal support of men over women. Such individuals also presume that the sort of husbands to whom the Prophet (peace be upon him) was referring when he spoke about wives prostrating before their husbands, if such a thing were permissible, was to a ubiquitous "everyman" which encompassed all men in all circumstances, irrespective of the qualities of those men as human beings.
The Qur'an asks us: "[25:43] Have you seen him who takes his low desires for his god? Will you then be a protector over him? [25:44] Or do you think that most of them do hear or understand? They are nothing but as cattle; nay, they are straying farther off from the path."
Does any human being with even a shred of common sense really suppose that the Prophet (peace be upon him) was saying that no matter how much a man might be steeped in abusive, selfish, cruel, inconsiderate, mean, arrogant, ignorant, unjust, hurtful, deceitful, insincere, uncaring, unloving, and exploitive behavior, that such a man still enjoyed a "degree above" their wives and, therefore, should be listened to or that the wishes and caprices of such men should be complied with without exception or reservation, or that such men were the kind of people to whom, if it were permissible, a woman should prostrate and whom were owed that level of respect and admiration? And, even in those instances when a woman is married to a man of good character, what does the Qur'an really mean when Revelation speaks of men enjoying a degree above their wives?
Is Allah talking about rights, intelligence, fiduciary responsibility, moral capacity, control, entitlements, or something else, and just what are the ramifications of such an assertion? This is one of the many spiritual boundary problems to which I have been alluding throughout this commentary.
Men who wish to be self-serving imagine all manner of things when it comes to the interpretation of the aforementioned Quranic phrase. In fact, this is the problem, they impose their own ideas on the Qur'an rather than waiting for Allah to take them back to the original meaning of the Quranic words (the real essence of true ta'wil) as takes place when God discloses the meanings of Divine words to a purified, sincere heart filled with taqwa or piety.
Some clever men who seek to justify abusive behavior toward their wives like to call upon the following Quranic ayat in an attempt to exonerate themselves from any blame or sense of wrong-doing for their abusive behavior: "Men are the maintainers of women because Allah has made some of them to excel others and because they spend out of their property; the good women are therefore obedient, guarding the unseen as Allah has guarded; and (as to) those on whose part you fear desertion, admonish them, and leave them alone in the sleeping-places and chasten them; then if they obey you, do not seek a way against them; surely Allah is High, Great. (4:34)" There are a number of boundary problems associated with the phase: "made some of them to excel" because, on the surface of things, one does not know precisely what Allah means except in a very general way, but let us put this sort of issue aside and focus on the aspects of this ayat which tend to get the juices of self-justification flowing in some men.
If a man fears desertion on the part of his wife can he automatically assume that the desertion is unjustified and, therefore, he has a right, in line with the counsel of the Qur'an to: (1) admonish her, and, if that doesn't work, then, (2) sleep in different places, and, then, if this doesn't work, to (3) chasten her? What if the wife is deserting the husband because he is abusive and not a very good person. Under such circumstances, does the husband really have a right to admonish her or to chasten her? -- and, I skip the second alternative noted above since an abused wife probably would welcome the opportunity to sleep apart and be left in peace.
There are many men who interpret the 3rd stage for engaging an recalcitrant, disobedient wife -- namely, the chastening component -- to mean that it constitutes a right to physically assault a woman. Even if one were able to agree about what qualifies someone as being a recalcitrant, disobedient wife - and, surely, the only trustworthy source for deciding this issue is Divinity and not the politics of the gender wars. The fact of the matter is, how all too many Muslim men interpret things in this case is not what is meant in the foregoing.
Even assuming, for the sake of argument, that in a given set of circumstances, a man happens to be correct (which is, by no means, a foregone conclusion) in relation to some dispute he is having with his wife, when the Prophet (peace be upon him) was asked about the meaning of this section of the ayat, he indicated that a man did not have the right to leave so much as a red pressure mark on a woman's body. More importantly, if one looks to the example of the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him), he never physically abused any of his wives - even on the few occasions when there may have been disagreements (for example, there was one occasion in which some of his wives were complaining about the lack of material wherewithal available to them, and he indicated that if they were unhappy with the way things were, then, they were free to make other marital arrangements, and that was the end of the matter).
A'yesha, (may Allah be pleased with her), one of the wives of the Prophet (peace be upon him), was once asked what the character of the Prophet (peace be upon him) was like. She answered: "Like the Qur'an."
If one wishes to gain insight into the teachings of the Qur'an, look to the sunnah, the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him). The character of the Prophet (peace be upon him) is like a mirror of the Qur'an - indeed, what we know of the Uncreated Word of God is an expression of the character of the spiritual capacity through which that Word was revealed - namely, the Muhammadan haqiqah (reality).
If one continues on with some of the passages in the Qur'an following the foregoing ayat, one finds: "[4:35] And if you fear a breach between the two, then appoint judge from his people and a judge from her people; if they both desire agreement, Allah will effect harmony between them, surely Allah is Knowing, Aware. [4:36] And serve Allah and do not associate any thing with Him and be good to the parents and to the near of kin and the orphans and the needy and the neighbor of (your) kin and the alien neighbor, and the companion in a journey and the wayfarer and those whom your right hands possess; surely Allah does not love him who is proud, boastful; [4:37] Those who are niggardly and bid people to be niggardly and hide what Allah has given them out of His grace; and We have prepared for the unbelievers a disgraceful chastisement."
What does one do if there are no suitable mediators, of if the possible mediators are biased? Or, perhaps, the couple does not desire reconciliation or even understand what this would entail in the way of how one or both parties would have to change in order to reach agreement and reciprocity.
If the husband and/or wife insists on their individual points of view quite apart from considerations of right, truth, adab, and justice, then, in effect, one is dealing with a lesser form of shirk because one or the other, or both, of the people are treating their personal opinions as being on a par with the knowledge of Divinity." Have you seen him who takes his low desires for his god? Will you then be a protector over him? Or do you think that most of them do hear or understand? They are nothing but as cattle; nay, they are straying farther off from the path."(25: 43-44)
If, contrary to the aforementioned counsel of the Qur'an, a husband is not good to parents or his children or the needy or one's neighbor (whether near or alien), or is proud, boastful, niggardly, and hides what Allah has given out of His Grace, or is an unbeliever, then, does such a man still enjoy a "degree above" women or "excel" over them or retain various rights quite apart from considerations of truth, justice, equity, decency, reciprocity, and integrity?
Within Islam, marriage is a contract between two individuals. The standard components of a contract are: offer, acceptance, and consideration.
Offer, acceptance, and consideration all take place within a context which has horizonal components that morally and spiritually modulate the focal dimensions of a given contract. Thus, irrespective of the specific considerations which form the central part of a contract, there is an adab that both surrounds and permeates the proper observance with respect to the expression of the spirit of that contract.
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: "Of all the things which Allah has made permissible, divorce is least pleasing to God. The Prophet (peace be upon him) also has said that "marriage is half the religion."
Presumably, the latter saying of the Prophet (peace be upon him) is an allusion to the manner in which bringing two people into a situation that, day in and day out, forces them to encounter the sort of conflicts, differences, stresses, and problems which place great demands on, and are a challenge to, one's spirituality. To successfully negotiate the many eddies and crosscurrents of a marriage, one must put into practice the requirements of Deen.
Moreover, presumably, the former tradition of the Prophet (peace be upon him), concerning the dimensions of permissibility as well as Divine displeasure with respect to divorce, reflects the inherent difficulty of marriage, while, simultaneously, serving as a cautionary warning against being cavalier and taking license with what Divinity permits.
Marriage, family, community, the state, constitutions, and Shari'ah all share at least one thing in common. When pursued properly, each of these is intended to create a safe, secure, peaceful 'space' within which to pursue the realization of life's purpose through exploring, understanding, struggling with, and acting upon the methodology of Deen to which Islam gives expression.
When there are breakdowns in the fabric of society, when the nature of 'aql', qiyas, ijmah, ijtihad, and fiqh have become inundated with boundary problems, when Dar-ul-Islam has largely disappeared from the world and everyone is immersed in the throes of Dar-ul-Harb, when we are fast approaching the latter part of the 'Latter Days', when 'fitna' is everywhere, and integrity is almost nowhere, when all too many mosques, imams, mullahs, qazis, and so-called shaykhs spiritually abuse those who come to them for assistance, when one no longer can easily identify whom can be trusted, when far too many people have become rule-governed in narrow, rigid, dogmatic, self-serving ways, rather than rooted in the principle-governed degrees of freedom, beauty, mercy, compassion, generosity, love, kindness, truth, and fairness which are reflected in the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him) and the Qur'an, then, what can be said to someone who asks: should I, and can I, divorce my husband? What is the right thing to do? What is permissible? What are my responsibilities? What is the adab?
One thing which can be done is Istikharah (prayer for guidance), and this is observed after witr prayers and just before one retires for the remainder of the night. Some say this consists in performing two ra'kats and saying surah 109 in the first ra'kat, and surah 112 in the second ra'kat, followed by a specific du'a or supplication that seeks determination concerning whether a given action is, or is not, beneficial for one's Deen.
Some people say that if one does the foregoing prayer, but one does not have any specific kashf, vision, or dream in response to the petition, then, the first strong feeling about the matter one has the following morning, is the answer, and if one does not have any specific experience or feeling, then, one should do the prayer again the next night. Some say one should adhere to the above procedure for three nights or until one gets a definite, clear indication -- which ever comes first -- while others maintain one should do the prayer until one gets a definite response. Still, others say that if one does not have a specific experience or feeling in relation to the petition, then, after three days, one may do whatever one deems to be in the best interests of truth, justice, adab, Deen, and so on.
If one does the Istikharah prayer, one should not have any preconceived notions about how one wishes the matter to be resolved. The whole idea of seeking guidance is to discover what God wishes for us, not what we want, and, therefore, one must be prepared to act on what is received.
However, although Istikharah may tell one in which direction to go, it doesn't necessarily tell one how to travel along the direction being indicated. Of course, having a direction is very important, and knowing that such a direction is something which has been Divinely selected for one is also extremely important, however, nonetheless, although Istikharah is intended as an assistance, it does not necessarily put an end to the problem of having to struggle with nafs, Iblis, dunya, or the unbelievers -- and this is so no matter what the specific direction may be which is given through Istikharah ... moreover, there is also the problem of what to do if no specific experience or feeling arises in conjunction with this practice -- and this does happen, and when it does, this is not because one's petition has gone unheard by Divinity or that the problem is an unimportant one, but, rather, because the very nature of life is to struggle to acquire knowledge rather than have it handed to us pre-processed ... even to understand the Qur'an requires struggle for the truth of Revelation.
The Qur'an, the conduct of the Prophet (peace be upon him), and our own spiritual capacity also all have been given to us as forms of spiritual assistance, but life is still difficult, and the need for striving does not disappear. If there were not so much spiritual abuse going on in the world, then, the journey could be made a lot easier and more pleasant, but such is not the case, and the Prophet (peace be upon him) warned believers that this would be so in the time approaching the Latter Days.
I will finish my commentary with something of a hypothetical. What would have happened if the Prophet (peace be upon him) had been permitted to remain with us, in a physical sense, over the last 1400-plus years?
As indicated previously, an important part of the nature of the Prophetic mission and a significant themes within the Qur'an involves the manner in which various cultural, social, marital, and spiritual practices and institutions were reformed over a period of time. The farewell Khutbah or sermon of the last Hajj of the Prophet (peace be upon him) gave heavy emphasis to the rights of women.
If the Prophet (peace be upon him) were living among us in a physical sense, would women continue to have been treated like chattel of men due to self-serving, imposed interpretations upon the Qur'an and the teachings of the Prophet (peace be upon him)? There are a lot more degrees of freedom inherent in principles than in rules, and when one combines the qualities of moral character in the life of the Prophet with the appropriate process of ta'wil concerning the Qur'an, then the nature of cultural, governmental, judicial, educational, and spiritual institutions might be very, very different than they are today.
Of course, although the Prophet did pass away physically, he still is with us today. The Qur'an says: "Think not of those who are slain in the way of Allah, as dead. Nay, they are living. With their Lord, they have a provision. Jubilant (are they) because of that which Allah has bestowed upon them of His bounty." (3:169-170)
Many people seem to suppose that Iblis is everywhere, but that the Prophet (peace be upon him) is nowhere. And, unfortunately, all too many people suppose that whatever they want to be the "way of Allah" is acceptable, but the ta'wil, or process of being taken back, by Allah, to the origins of significance inherent in this phrase is very different from what many people may believe and try to impose on that phrase, and, thus, the meaning of the "way of Allah" is a very essential expression of the boundary problem issue about which I have been commenting throughout this essay. Furthermore, when, love for Allah and his Rasul become more important to us than anything else, then, perhaps, we will be ready to listen with every fiber of our spiritual capacity to what we are being told all along about the nature of the "way" and how to pursue it in order, among other things, to gain understanding about how to proceed with the boundary problems of life.
The foregoing commentary gives expression to many of the factors which make us all very vulnerable to being exploited by spiritual abuse - whether in the form of dogmatic mullahs or in the persona of a false Sufi shaykh. The failure to address the boundary problem in a proper fashion constitutes the demon seed from which terrorism of all shapes, sizes and colors sprouts forth like weeds in a desert. And, those who develop into physical and material terrorists have become so because, first, they were exposed to the sort of spiritual abuse which has corrupted their capacity to think through the support of Intellectus rather than the self-serving arbitrariness of ratio. The same seeds of spiritual abuse are being sown throughout the Muslim world, and we are all at risk ... both from without and from within.
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