Humility
Humility is not exactly a growth industry in today's world.
However, Sufi masters maintain this quality is of fundamental
importance to the mystical path.
Humility is both a fruit of the path, as well as a key which,
God willing, opens the door to further possibilities of spiritual
growth during the mystical journey. Nonetheless, one does
not seek humility as a means to something else. Humility has
an intrinsic spiritual worth.
To varying degrees, most of us are lacking in humility. There
are different reasons for this.
Some of this relative deficiency in humility is due to the times
in which we live. From a very early age, many of us taught,
both within our families and in school, to be somewhat
aggressive and assertive in promoting ourselves.
Being able to impress other people, helps create
opportunities. We have to let other people know whom we
are and what we can do.
As long as one can deliver, as long as one can back up the
self-promotion with competence, skill, talent and intelligence,
then a certain amount of cocky confidence is considered by
our society as not only acceptable, but admirable, if not
necessary. Such confidence is thought to be an important
ingredient in the quest for success and accomplishment.
On the other hand, too much of this self-promotional
assertiveness, becomes annoying and, often, is
counterproductive. It rubs people the wrong way and
generates friction, conflict and animosity.
To grasp the boundaries of propriety in this area of
self-promotion, not to mention the more difficult challenge of
acquiring humility, can be a trying and humbling affair.
Many hard lessons concerning self-promotion and humility
have to be digested during the socialization process involving
family, friends, school and work.
Unfortunately, the problems of learning how to live within the
boundaries of propriety, or learning the more demanding
qualities of humility, is exacerbated by many aspects of
modern life. For example, all too many professional athletes,
television and movie stars, recording artists, cultural icons
and politicians think of arrogance and self-centeredness as
virtues. Indeed, relative to many of these people, who don't
seem to know the meaning of propriety, mere cocky
confidence would seem like the essence of humility itself.
The "example" being set by some of these paragons of
excess and braggadocio is having an increasingly devastating
impact on grade schools, high schools, colleges and
universities. The atmosphere they help to create is conducive
to the breeding of all manner of arrogance, pride, and
conceit in the minds and hearts of those who worship at the
altar of their idols.
Power, money, fame, talent, and intelligence have a way of
eating away at the line separating a certain degree of
self-confidence and the slippery slope of pride. However, we
all have the potential to cross this line even if our
circumstances should be entirely modest and without, for
example, celebrity status of any kind.
The Sufi masters speak of the pharaoh within each of us.
This is our tendency toward feeling superior to others. The
pharaoh within us is naturally inclined to a sense of
self-importance and operates according to the belief it has a
right to be self-indulgent, self-centered and vain.
Our pharaoh considers itself to have an exalted place in the
scheme of things, no matter how small the desert may be in
which it reigns supreme. Occupying such a lofty place,
entitles us, or so our pharaoh believes, to treat other people
with contempt and disrespect.
Conversely, our pharaoh does not tolerate being on the
receiving end of contempt or disrespect from anyone else.
Much of the "dissing" phenomenon that is current and leads
to so many ugly confrontations is an expression of what
happens when pharaoh meets pharaoh.
According to the practitioners of the Sufi path, each of us is
charged with the task of Prophet Moses (peace be upon him).
We must convey the message of God to our pharaohs, both
collectively and individually, to let our people go.
We must struggle with our pharaohs in order to journey
toward the promised land of humility. To achieve humility, is,
by the grace of God, to be modest in all things and to give
deference and veneration to others.
Humility is about having no expectation toward others
concerning what is due to one. Moreover, when one is
wronged or dealt with unjustly, one is gentle, mild and
forbearing in response.
Humility is to prefer others to oneself. Humility is to have an
heart-felt respect for the essential worth of all human beings,
as well as all of creation.
Humility is a matter of being ready to yield to the wishes of
others and knowing when this yielding is appropriate to do
with respect to the requirements of spiritual etiquette.
Humility is filled with the wisdom of understanding the rights
which have been given to others by God.
There is an humbleness about humility which places things in
perspective. To have humility, is to be aware of one's faults
and weaknesses. Therefore, the person of humility, neither
swells up with pride at the sound of praise, nor is that
individual deflated when criticism comes her or his way.
One cannot have humility without being immersed in
submission before, and servitude to, God. In fact, this
submission and servitude is the fertile soil out of which the
flower of humility grows.
Sufi masters are very adept in showing initiates how to till
the soil of servitude. Spiritual guides do this through their
own beautiful example of servitude and submission.
Sufi shaykhs also care for the seeds of humility which have
been planted in human beings by God. They provide spiritual
nourishment and protection for the struggling seedling.
In addition, spiritual guides are very skilled in helping to
remove the weeds of the individual's ego which threaten to
strangle the growth of humility. In this respect, one kind of
off-shoot of the ego which is particularly dangerous and must
be removed from the garden of the soul is the weed of false
humility.
The ego has a great capacity for mimicry. In order to serve
its ultimate agenda, the ego can take on the external
appearance of, among other things, humility.
The ego can appear meek, mild, submissive, humble,
respectful and deferential. However, all of this is a
self-serving act to enhance its own sense of
self-aggrandizement. For example, when others comment on
how humble and respectful the person of false humility is,
inwardly such a person exults in the rays of praise extended
to him or her. People of false humility live for this sort of
notice and acknowledgment. For them, humility is not a
spiritual issue. Rather, it is an issue of ego gratification.
People of false humility are very annoyed if people fail to
take notice of their "spiritual" condition. Moreover, when
the desired acknowledgment is not forthcoming, they tend to
get moody, sullen, and withdrawn. They often feel people do
not appreciate their true spiritual greatness.
Differentiating between true humility and false humility can
be quite difficult. To do so, takes: either (a) the experienced
eye and understanding of a Sufi shaykh; or, (b) the spiritual
training which can be gained through the shaykh.
To have humility, does not mean the individual is devoid of
self-esteem. However, this sense of self worth has nothing to
do with the sort of cocky confidence spoken of earlier.
One has esteem for the spiritual self because it provides us
with the opportunity for realizing our relationship with God.
One values the spiritual self because it is a unique gift from
God which contains hidden within it a vast array of spiritual
treasures, one of which is humility.
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